It seems that in our modern society catcalling has become quite the problem. While I personally have never been catcalled, I understand that it is a daily annoyance for some folks, especially women for some reason. Despite how sad and disappointing it is that I even had to made this guide, I have compiled some tips and tricks for dealing with catcalling.

1. First and foremost: DO NOT RESPOND. The purpose of catcalling is to get a response out of you. By not responding you keep all of the situational power to yourself.

2. If you absolutely, positively, have to respond, do so by elevating and changing the nature of the conversation.

3. I know this may sound terrible, but the best way to deal with catcalling is to not get catcalled in the first place … Sorry.

4. Another thing you can do when getting catcalled is bark loudly like a dog to scare off the cat caller.

5. If you’re not sure if you’re getting cat called, pick up your phone. If you hear meowing, you’re probably getting cat called.

6. If you suspect you’re getting cat called, don’t answer, but do write down the number. Turning the number over to the appropriate authorities can help lower the number of cat callers.

7. Change your phone number to include the numbers 8 or 9. It’s been scientifically proven that cats cannot conceptually understand numbers above 7.

8. Try meowing back to the cat. This will confuse the cat caller and they might think you’re also a cat and won’t call you again.

9. Watch how you dress. Cats are attracted to wool sweaters and mom jeans so maybe if you didn’t wear those you wouldn’t get cat called so much. Just sayin.