TU’s MRS degree focuses on how to multitask as a young mother. One approach is growing more arms. graphic by Conner Maggio

TU proposes MRS degree

Exciting new opportunities arise for female TU students who are sick of their overly-academic studies. Ladies! Have you had a tough semester? Did midterms really get to you? Is your STEM career path looking too difficult to carry on with? Congratulations! Your Christian prayers have been answered. Next semester, the University of Tulsa will offer […]

Goldie ready to trade in some suspicious meat to her favorite butcher, We Promise We Don’t Sell Cats. graphic by Conner Maggio

Where have all the cats gone?

Campus cats mysteriously vanish around Collins Hall. We might be nearing the end of spooky season, but don’t get too relaxed. Halloween is just around the corner, waiting to jumpscare the Snickers out of you. Unfortunately, tricks, treats and spoopy shenanigans aren’t the only things escalating in the runup to Halloween. According to Campus Security […]

Highlight reel from the VP’s visit to ORU

Mike Pence came to Tulsa to support Kevin Stitt and faced consequences from Oral Roberts himself With the 2018 midterm elections rapidly approaching, the campaign cycle whirlwind is in full force — endorsements, attack ads and rallies flying everywhere — and Oklahoma is no stranger to tornadoes: literal and political. If you didn’t attend or […]

The spookiest haunted house on campus

Skip Tulsa’s highly commercialized haunted house scene and experience true terror right here at TU. Psycho Path? Nah. The Hex House? Pssh. The Nightmare? Hell nah. Why settle for the cheap jumpscares and blood-soaked everything of those basic haunted houses when you can experience true terror? If you really want to be frightened, there is […]

A baby boomer poking holes in millennials’ condoms to uphold traditional marriage values. graphic by Conner Maggio

Millennials killing the institution of marriage

Old folks hate the youngins for ruining our country’s traditional marriage values. America is in grave danger. The pillars that uphold our righteous society are crumbling down around us. A dark change is blowing in the wind, ripping away all that we hold close to our hearts. Blink and the world around you will morph […]

graphic by Conner Maggio

Coke puts coke back in Coke

Nothing says Coca-Cola like cocaine! Coming soon to supermarket shelves near you, Coca-Cola has announced a new line of cocaine-infused beverages. “There’s a massive hype around CBD [cannabidiol, a pain-relieving compound found in marijuana]-infused products these days,” said Coca-Cola spokesperson Karl Rimm in a recent press conference, “and companies are making a killing putting it […]

Great British Porno

The newest season of The Great British Baking Show piqued the interest of many top porn companies. Your bag of chips is full. Your blanket nest is warm. Netflix is pulled up and you’re ready to binge-watch the newest season of “The Great British Baking Show,” never mind the fact that the only thing you’ve […]