There are many different options for what to do with Kendall Hall, but which option is the best? Unless you are horrifically unobservant, you most certainly heard that The University of Tulsa cut the theater degree program, and this year, the doors to Kendall Hall have been permanently closed. Well, except for TUTV; for anything […]
Professors ask students to tip after lectures and grading exams because they obviously don’t get paid enough. If you ask the students of TU — or any student anywhere — if professors have it tough, they will say no. However, professors have been silently struggling against skyrocketing inflation and dropping student engagement. TU professors have […]
The training was accompanied by new policy encouraging all students to strap up. As it does every fall, the university has recently released its mandatory online trainings. The usual consent and alcohol use trainings are present, but students noticed this past Friday an additional unit added to the list: firearm usage. In an era of […]
The lawn Roombas get a taste for blood. Administration doesn’t care, but what else is new? In August, TU bought two oversized Roombas to mow the grass in the Old U. They were quickly deemed harmless by everyone except the obsessive-compulsive students on campus, who were horrified when they looked upon the vast green and […]
Numerous governmental officials in the United States have begun acting upon impulse in a moment paralysing the U.K. Article republished with permission of The Telegraph. In wake of her majesty’s passing, many American politicians have felt the reality of their own potential demise. Efforts therein have grown split between attempts to prolong further the unholy […]
TU Panhellenic Council pledges to work towards a future with more hair color diversity, frats protest. Ever working towards a progressive future, the Notorious RBG-pin-wearing chairwoman of the Panhellenic council made a public statement on the trajectory of future sorority demographic makeups. Her speech highlighted that “it’s not the hair color that matters, it’s whether […]
First-year student getting confused as to which campus ministry group they need to join to avoid eternal damnation. Picture this: walking by yourself, minding your own goddamn business, trying to walk to the Allen Chapman Student Union when suddenly, a saint appears. This delegate of all that is holy pronounces: “Do you want the smallest […]
Local crystal girl shares her expertise because your aura is seriously fucked up. If you’re looking for love this semester, ditch Tinder and stop stalking coffee shop patrons. You’ve “accidentally” spilled scalding hot coffee on enough people and are running out of coffee shops that you aren’t banned from. Just keep some rose quartz in […]
As the esteemed satire editor at The Collegian, I would like to welcome all first-year students to our quirky little campus. I know you all will make the university and your parents proud — that is if you are a CS major who ends up working for a military contractor, otherwise they will be most […]
Guess what? I’m doing it, and you can’t stop me! What are you going to do? Pry the Phantom of the Opera off my shoulders and make him stop giving me a deep tissue body massage? You can’t! His hands are lotioned! For a year, I have begged and pleaded with my so-called benevolent fellow […]
