Your school is a bit like a marriage. It’s at least a 4-year commitment, and it has its ups and its downs. And just like a marriage, sometimes one’s loyalty must be renewed and reconfirmed in an expensive and self-conscious way. I’m talking of course about homecoming. Here are ten ways how you, too, can show your future alma mater just how much you care.
1. When singing in the shower, replace “Call Me Maybe” with the Alma Mater.
2. Only go to unpopular sports’ games. Paint yourself blue and be psychotically excited at softball games. “WOOO!! Row, Row, Row your boat, ladies!!!”
3. Obsess over Goldie and make sure all your non-TU friends are aware that YOUR school has a golden retriever. Who also now has a car, apparently.
4. Fill your everyday conversations with TU-related puns. “Thunderstorm? You mean a Tulsa Hurricane?” or “I think the U.S. should go back to the gold standard… or should I say, the Golden Hurricane standard?”
5. Actually learn the lyrics to the fight song. Apparently we have one.
6. Spend hours doing your course evaluations; it’s an investment in future generations of students, and another way to avoid doing actual work.
7. Make arbitrary purchase decisions based on a product’s color. Always choose blue soap, and go for the golden kitchen towels, even if they are slightly more expensive.
8. Instagram everything. A picture of your dorm is just that until there’s a nostalgic filter on it. And you don’t actually have to go to the game if you just take a selfie and add #gameday.
9. Yell and scream and cheer anytime a hurricane gets mentioned on the Weather Channel.
10. Work really hard, get good grades, find a respectable job that makes you happy. Go TU.