The Void: What should I say to a grieving friend?

We’ve all been there. You’re minding your own business, ignoring the feelings of uselessness and mortal fear, when out of the blue, your friend sends you a message informing you that one of their loved ones has died or gotten cancer or something else, completely ruining your perfectly good day. How dare they.

Ugh. You want to just tell them to fuck off but social norms requires you to send them some type of “condolence.” What a pitiful world. You could send them a crying emoticon, but that might seem disingenuous. You wouldn’t want your friend to suspect that you don’t actually care. A classic “I’m here if you need to talk,” is usually good, but what if they actually try to talk to you? That would be dreadful, and absolutely the opposite of what you’re trying to accomplish here. You’re tempted to just send them a sad gif, that wouldn’t take much effort, however you’re afraid they might think that would be weird. This whole situation is just infuriating.

And for a second, just a second, you feel bad. You remember how you felt the last time something tragic happened in your life. You remember how much you just wanted someone to be there for you. You remember how you wanted to just talk, not about anything in particular. You just needed noise to help you cope. You feel bad because you know that your friend is scared and confused and you have the capability to alleviate some of the stress they are feeling right now. It would be a small annoyance for you but a huge relief for them.

But you snap out of it. You were being overdramatic. Your friend will be fine. They need to learn how to deal with stuff like that anyway. You shoot them a quick “That sucks, man. I’m sorry,” and then go back to watching cat videos on the internet.

Post Author: tucollegian

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *