Biden livin’ it up at his new retirement home. graphic by Emma Palmer

“Uncle” Joe Biden trapped in 2012 time loop

Biden’s either a time lord or it’s time to send him to a home.

If you’ve watched the recent Democratic debates, you obviously have seen the mess of ridiculous liberals the Democrats have decided to field. Sure we all know about Mayor Pete (is he calling himself that because he wants to be homey and #relatable or because really no one can pronounce Buttigieg?), and the several candidates who speak Spanish regularly (but honestly they’re just pandering poorly with a memorized bit of Spanish, nothing more), but the real enigma of the primaries so far has been the liberal’s beloved “Uncle” Joe Biden.

Biden’s performance in the debates hasn’t even been what liberals would call “A+ work” or even “good,” but he’s managed to make one thing clear: he was in the White House at the same time Obama was. Almost every policy Biden discusses harkens back to that awful time when the biggest drama surrounding U.S. politics was Obamacare and socialized medicine coming out of the White House.

Actually, Biden discusses the years he was in office so much that it feels like he’s talking about yesterday, and it’s becoming more and more clear he really thinks 2012 was five minutes ago. All of Biden’s stances are a photocopy of the Obama 2008 campaign. After Biden lost the nomination, he went on to vice-presidential debates. It’s obvious he thinks the crowded debates he took part in earlier this year were just the 2012 vice-presidential debates, and that some idiots fielded vice-presidential candidates for libertarians and the Green Party.

In the most recent debate, Biden literally suggested that parents play record players before their kids go to bed. This is just another sign pointing to the fact that he’s lost control of what time he’s in. Suddenly his omission of unique policy proposals in favor of waxing poetic about Obama makes sense. He has to think that he must, because the dynamic duo is running together again!

Biden’s sanity slippage make some of his gaffes make more sense. First off, Biden thought he was still vice president during the Parkland shooting in 2018. You know, two years into President Trump’s term? This only makes sense if it’s been one long slog in the White House from 2008 to now.
Don’t forget that he also confused Mitt Romney and Donald Trump at a rally when talking about his opponent in the general election. How do you confuse them when one is literally from Mormon HQ, USA and the other one sure as hell doesn’t know any God I pray to? If Biden can’t even remember the year, how do you expect him to remember his opponent?

Biden definitely thinks he’s in 2012, and thankfully it’s harming his campaign. While Biden might still have a “comfortable” lead, the debates continue to hit him hard, and Sanders and Warren are eating away at Biden’s lead. Does Biden have the staying power to keep up with these somehow less addled candidates? Nope! Especially since Biden looks older than Hillary did in 2016. Biden definitely didn’t win in 2008 and wasn’t on top of the ticket in 2012, so if he continues to summon Obama to give him the win because he believes it’s 2012, there will be some trouble in the future for “Uncle” Joe Biden.

Post Author: Hannah Robbins