The kingly duo that rules The Collegian, the political science department, and US West apartments turn their attention toward America’s most hotly debated question.
Point: Zach Short
Regardless of what my opponent would have you believe, abortion access in the states is under attack like never before and in need of federal protections. The technocratic element in the U.S., however, is to blame for the successful efforts to restrict the right to an abortion. The bourgeois element lining the democratic party and many “think tanks” portrays abortion as a decision only made in the direst of circumstances, e.g., survival of the expectant parent or fetus at risk and cases of rape or incest. In actuality, the circumstances that prompt the decision to have an abortion should be irrelevant.
[Maddie: The choice should be left up to the individual, not the state.]
Shut up Maddie; you’re out of your element.
In any case, Mr. Garrison and other agents of the technocracy (viz., the demiurge) would have you believe that a complicating factor must be present. Just looking at the party propaganda for the democrats, almost every advertisement takes a pathos approach to persuasion, hoping to tug at the audience’s heartstrings, and seldom do any of these ads mention the right to an abortion independent of mentioning circumstances like the aforementioned cases. And make no mistake, I absolutely defend the right to an abortion in any and all of those situations such that the person carrying the fetus makes that decision, but I also defend the right in any other case as well. The choice should be left up to the individual, not the state.
We need now to resist the propaganda of the technocracy and to secure legislation to protect the right to an abortion, Kyle’s presence as my roommate notwithstanding.
Counterpoint: Kyle Garrison
What my collegue’s myopic argument misses is that we must insulate the right to abortion from market forces which seek to commodify women as childbearing cogs in the capitalist machine. The reification of women in the capitalist superstructure upholds patriarchal values by means of restricting abortion access except for in cases which a bourgeoisie patriarch benefits. Abortion bans do not preserve life, they maintain the capitalist state of exploitation.
[Maddie: To put it quite simply, abortion laws are put into place to subjugate women.]
Shut up Maddie; you have no frame of reference here, Maddie. You’re like a child who wanders into the middle of a movie.
Make no mistake, if the CEO of Raytheon wants his mistress to get an abortion in Texas, access will not be an issue for him. The explicit reason for restricting abortion laws is to subjugate women and specifically working class women and often women of color. Freeing women from oppressive laws restricting their bodily autonomy is imperative to the revolution.
If we cannot protect the fundamental human rights of our citizens, then we are a failed state. Despite the innumerable arguments otherwise, abortion laws are put into place to subjugate women.
My distinguished adversary Zach fails to fully appreciate the importance of protecting the right to choose regardless of situation. Capitalist exploitation relies heavily on the oppression of women. The Democratic Party, while outwardly supporting abortion rights, have failed to act effectively in response to the actions of the fascistic actions of the right.
We need specific legislation that legalizes abortion. Without it millions of women are vulnerable to tyrannical laws. You have nothing to lose but your chains.
Disclaimer: Reminder, this is a satire article, and the three writers are friends, and commonly bicker for fun. If you have ever had the misfortune to take a class with all three of us together, you know this all too well.
