Farewell letter: Kyle Garrison

Well, it happened. The woke mob finally got me. Has cancel-culture gone too far? [Omit, rhetorical question – Zach]. I will no longer edit the satire section due to my potential imminent graduation. To the few who actually read this, write for the collegian next year. I beg of you, you will probably not regret […]

Taylor Swift watches “21 Jump Street,” becomes antisemite

Swift rebukes West’s response to Jonah Hill’s performance. 12-time Grammy-winning feminist icon, blue-eyed and blonde-haired legend Taylor Swift took a stance against her long time adversary Kanye West in an Instagram post stating “I don’t know what that misogynist Kanye was talking about, I watched ‘21 Jump Street’ and I hate Jewish people now.” In […]

TU headhunts Dick Cheney to lead new hunting department

Is the former vice president in the sights for TU’s scouting squad? Tulsa OK – Looking to innovate in fields of study, TU is headhunting a leader for a new hunting department and rumors are, Dick Cheney is their number one prospect. Under fire for their discriminatory hiring practices, The University of Tulsa takes aim […]

Point Counterpoint: Do not do your homework

The kingly duo that rules The Collegian and the political science department answers the question plaguing colleges everywhere. Point (Kyle): Why would I do my homework? To satiate the bottomless pit of need seen in the repeated assignments by professors? I think not. These professors are never satisfied with essays. My theory is they love […]

The Instagram ally’s manifesto

As a male feminist, I know all the lyrics to “Put Your Records On” I am writing this to tell my story as a middle class cishet white man, who has bravely fought alongside the oppressed when convenient. I am here. I retweet infographics which I do not read. I put confusingly formatted but still […]

Why I am pro recreational marijuana

Here are the top ten reasons to make weed legal on Tuesday, March 7. Visit https://okvoterportal.okelections.us/ to locate your polling location. It makes the show “Velma” 12% more tolerable. It’s still miserable, but try it sober. You’ll put your fist through the TV before you can say “ruh-roh.” It is a win for gummy bear […]

Law School updates stance on the gays

TU Law School to replace outdated “Don’t Say Gay” by law with new “Don’t Be Gay” policy. Tulsa, OK – The University of Tulsa College of Law has come under fire for its recent change in by-laws on the issue of whether it is possible for gays to be lawyers. Dean Oren Griffin answers this […]

Goldie spotted with younger lab?

Goldie has a new sugar baby in a lab half her age! Leonardo Dicaprio who? Canine ambassador or COUGAR ambassador? Our sources say Goldie took out a young lab pup for a “puppuccino” on TU’s dime. The question that is on everyone’s minds is: who is this new lover and will it last? After a […]