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The Collegian’s uncertain future after budget cuts

The Collegian’s uncertain future after budget cuts

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CAPS rapidly certifies 30 new therapists for start of football season, promptly fires them after OSU obliterated

CAPS rapidly certifies 30 new therapists for start of football season, promptly fires them after OSU obliterated

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Movie Review: The Odyssey

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Football program institutes draconian new policy in community space

Football program institutes draconian new policy in community space

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  • Shelby Heins

Shelby Heins

9 posts
QuickTrip Controversy?
Posted in Satire The State-Run Media

QuickTrip Controversy?

on 9 September 2024

No one pulls a fast one on us. Not even the man himself. Returning TU students were devastated last week…

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Attractions to see in Tulsa
Posted in Variety

Attractions to see in Tulsa

on 27 August 2024

Tulsa is not as boring as you think, hopefully. Tulsa has a rich history complete with tons of landmarks, tourist…

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Counterpoint: I hate cinnamon rolls
Posted in Satire The State-Run Media

Counterpoint: I hate cinnamon rolls

on 4 March 2024

It’s fine if you like bland white people food. Just say that. When you wake up in the morning to…

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Personal Ad: Chauffeur?
Posted in Satire The State-Run Media

Personal Ad: Chauffeur?

on 5 February 20244 February 2024

Broke Editor-in-Chief, 20’s, needs intelligent chauffeur who “knows their way around.” Interests include the 2002 version of “The Count of…

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TU edges students and prioritizes Starship robot safety
Posted in Satire The State-Run Media

TU edges students and prioritizes Starship robot safety

on 22 January 202422 April 2024

Students experienced a roller coaster of emotions Sunday evening into Monday morning as TU gaslit students into thinking they would…

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Why is Pat Case really closed?
Posted in Satire The State-Run Media

Why is Pat Case really closed?

on 9 October 2023

Emergency repairs? Please. An email was sent out late Thursday evening informing students that Pat Case Dining Center will be…

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Professors ask students to tip for their services
Posted in Satire The State-Run Media

Professors ask students to tip for their services

on 26 September 202222 April 2024

Professors ask students to tip after lectures and grading exams because they obviously don’t get paid enough. If you ask…

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Rabid lawn Roombas out for blood
Posted in Satire The State-Run Media

Rabid lawn Roombas out for blood

on 19 September 202222 April 2024

The lawn Roombas get a taste for blood. Administration doesn’t care, but what else is new? In August, TU bought…

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Student guide to using crystals the right way
Posted in Satire The State-Run Media

Student guide to using crystals the right way

on 5 September 202222 April 2024

Local crystal girl shares her expertise because your aura is seriously fucked up. If you’re looking for love this semester,…

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