Aries (March 20th-April 19th): October begins this week! The harvest moon waxes as the supernatural word quickens before All Hallow’s…
Pat Case servers achieve nuclear fission
Dining center awarded Nobel Prize after splitting the atom to reduce portion sizes. The Nobel Foundation recently announced that the…
Horoscopes
Aries (March 20th-April 19th): What mysterious force is responsible for our misfortunes and triumphs? And what right have we to…
Horoscopes
Aries (March 21st-April 19th): This week, carry a roll of duct tape in your backpack. You’ll know when and where…
Secret service: Lorton Performance Center not enough, Tulsa shut down for the day
38% of Tulsa residents to be forcefully ejected into neighboring cities ahead of Supreme Court Justice visit. Ahead of Supreme…
$130 million recovered from Starship robots rolling towards DC
Brad Carson the mastermind of plot to ruin the University of Tulsa. Last week, it was reported that $130 million…
CAPS rapidly certifies 30 new therapists for start of football season, promptly fires them after OSU obliterated
The University of Tulsa’s Counseling Services combats the emotional highs and lows of the sport. As the football season at…
Horoscopes
Aries (March 21st-April 19th): In a few days time, as the night becomes day, you will wake up with the…
University Bookstore improves from 110% to 115% efficiency
Textbook wait time hits a record nine hour low thanks to Tulsa’s lifelong ally Barnes and Noble. Doubleplusgood news as…
Horoscopes
Aries (March 20th-April 19th): This semester will be one of great growth for you, Aries — specifically under your left…