State-Run Media Mad-Libs

_______________ introduces new ____________ -ridden mattresses

The price of _______ makes up a large amount of both _______ and ______ spending, and the high cost prevents a lot of _______ from ______ on campus. With this new policy, ______ is projected to become much more ________.

The University of Tulsa’s _______ department has recently implemented a new policy — using ____, ________, _____-ridden mattresses for the freshman dorms. The department claims that by using these beds, bought from a _____ homeless man down on ______ and ______, the school is saving _______ of dollars a semester, which in light of recent events could, in fact, lower tuition.
“It’s just overall a great idea,” said _______ spokesperson ____ ______ . “If the school can save money on bedding for the increasingly large freshman classes, those funds can go elsewhere, like _________.”
Not only does this new policy allow for the university to diversify its spending, but lower costs of beds means lower costs of ______. The mother of one new student has expressed her approval of the new beds. “My little ______ gets to live on campus this year because housing costs have dropped so low!” she told State-Run reporters. “I’m just so _____ my child gets to enjoy the full college experience.”
While no _______ have yet to use these new beds, overall reception has been very _______. When asked if the University had any other plans for lowering spending, ______ muttered, “Well, there’s always the _______.” making a sideways glance toward _______.

Post Author: tucollegian

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