The candles are advertised to burn for eight semesters straight. graphic by Sarah Le

vTU to release building-themed candles

The University of Tulsa is rolling out new products that everyone will want on their holiday wishlist.

Scents are simple yet potent things that can bring you back to a special moment in time. If you miss your hometown, chances are, there is a Homesick candle of some apple-cinnamon burgundy-leather amalgamation out there to remind you of Texas. But, TU is your home too, so when you go home for winter break, or once you graduate, take a little piece of TU with you.

Introducing: TU Building Homesick candles.

These candles will take you straight from the comfort of your room to TU campus. While a full selection of 50+ Homesick candles for each of the buildings on campus will be available for purchase at the TU Bookstore starting in November, here are nine scents expected to fly off the shelves this year.

Lovely Lottie: Experience every single perfume, lotion and candle from Bath and Body Works mixed together, plus the acrid aroma of burnt popcorn and hair.

Juicy John: Undertones of gym socks, microwaved burritos and cotton candy. The cotton candy notes will mentally trigger the piercing shrill of fire alarms thanks to all of the boys who thought they could get away with vaping their sweet, succulent eJuices in the bathroom.

Keplinger Keepsake: A seductive waft of cigarette smoke, traces of five different brands of pizza and the breeze of a salty wind will take you directly to a wobbly table in Keplinger, surrounded by ENS students whose faces and books are stained with tears.

Rayzor Rain: The world’s first moisturizing candle. It captures Rayzor’s constant mysterious dampness, plus incorporates an ever so gentle wisp of electrical fire. The candle is so moist that it is impossible to light.

Odors of Oliphant: Mingling smells of asbestos, dust and pond scum. This candle has three layers, one for each of Oliphant’s three floors.

Helmerich Hell: Despite Helmerich hosting the business college, it has no business having so many roaches, wasps, flies and other pests roaming the halls. The candle features real, organic chunks of cockroaches found in Helmerich’s bathrooms, and releases the scent of professional plague and pestilence.

Tranquility in Tyrrell: How does this building smell like new cars and dust at the same time? Tyrrell’s mystery is encapsulated in this candle, its scent to be released at your mercy.

Musty McFarlin: A combination of mildew, stagnant water and fresh-brewed coffee is a scent known to all TU students, triggering the universal memory of studying in McFarlin for exams at two in the morning.

The Calm of Collins Hall: Revisit the days when your adventure at TU was just beginning! The scent of the entire student body is encapsulated in this candle, as students from all around the world congregated in Collins Hall during student tours and orientation week to contribute to its air.

You could say that this Homesick candle combines the scent of all Homesick candles ever made. As you burn this candle and reminisce, you may slowly begin to regret ever attending TU. You may begin to burn from the inside out until you and the candle join as one: exhausted, burnt-out mortals in the passing of time.

Post Author: Sarah Le