Q: It’s my senior year and the only new guys around campus are freshman. I’m into this one guy but I can’t decide if he’s too young for me. Help!
Sincerely,
Feeling Old
You need to ask yourself if you’re looking for a boy just to have one around, or if you really do like this guy. If you’re looking for a guy just to have one, then good for you, but don’t forget about the juniors, sophomores, and dare I say it, grad students! Plus, I really doubt that you know every male in the senior class. If your heart (or anything else) is set on this freshman, then so be it. If you think this guy is too young for you because of his age then try getting to know him better. If you think he’s too young based on his actual maturity level, then he is definitely too young, and it’ll probably irritate you constantly.
If you like this guy because you like like him, then I say go for it! The worst that can happen is he says he’s not interested or the two of you just don’t work out. Just remember that while you’re savoring the last year of college and getting ready for the real world, he’s just getting started, and the two of you won’t always be on the same page because of that.
Q: I’m underage and I’ve never lived in a dorm before. After this party last weekend some girl was super drunk and spilled beer on my floor. It smells and the carpet is stained, and I’m scared my RA will notice. What do I do?
Sincerely,
Partied Hard
Firstly, don’t invite that girl over again if she’s drunk, she’ll probably just spill something else. Secondly, take a breath because it’s probably not as bad as you think it is. Buy some Febreeze and use it. In fact, use the Febreeze regularly, it’s a good habit. If you’re worried about the stain itself, throw a rug over it. A word to the wise: RA’s aren’t as oblivious as some think they are. If your RA asks about it, don’t panic, just say your friend spilled her drink.
Q: My girlfriend wants to know about my sexual history but I’ve told her everything I’m comfortable with. She keeps pressing for more details; how do I keep her happy without giving her a play-by-play of my sex life?
Sincerely,
Don’t want to kiss and tell
Hopefully, one of the things you were comfortable telling her was whether you have ever tested positive for an STI, and if you’ve been tested recently. If not, shame on you. If you have given her all of the pertinent information, good job. When you say play-by-play, the first thing that comes to mind is that your girlfriend wants graphic detail of your past sexual encounters. If that’s what she’s looking for, then I can’t blame you for being uncomfortable, that stuff is between you and your past partners.
The most important part of any relationship is communication. Try sincerely asking her why she wants to know. Is it jealousy, or does she just want to know more about your boundaries and experiences? Maybe she’s insecure about differences in your experiences or even the number of past partners each of you has had.
Tell her directly that she’s making you uncomfortable. If she wants to know about your boundaries and interests, you can work it out from there. If she feels entitled to your past and continues to push, consider breaking up with her. Everyone has their own, unique history and it’s up to you to decide how much of it you’re willing to share (past the health reasons, of course). She doesn’t own your past, and you certainly don’t owe her a play-by-play of anything.
