Koch rallies millionaires
Wichita’s favorite sons, Charles and David Koch, aren’t afraid to shell out their billions. If you’re particularly observant, you’ll notice a classroom in Helmerich Hall bearing the Koch name. Most likely, after they die, ACAC, or ACSU, or the Union, will be named after them. Poor Allen will dwindle into the forgotten depths of donors past. Most recently, Charles Koch ponied up to keep men’s basketball coach Gregg Marshall at Wichita State. With the possibility of an aggressive push from the University of Alabama, Koch rallied the troops (by troops, I mean millionaires) to raise Marshall’s salary from $1.85 to $3 million per year. So, hopefully, after new Tulsa football coach Philip Montgomery leads TU to its first-ever national championship, the Koch brothers will keep him around with an appropriate raise.
P.J. Williams arrested
On Friday, former Florida State cornerback P.J. Williams was arrested by FSU’s campus police for driving under the influence of alcohol. Notably, this wasn’t Williams’s first date with Johnny Law. In a previous incident, Williams drifted across a median, caused a head-on collision, and fled the scene on foot. Tallahassee Police levied the hand of God on him … with two tickets. Corresponding to Friday’s DUI, Williams had some trouble driving around campus before being pulled over by a campus police officer. Williams was drunk enough to not drive, but sober enough to realize he shouldn’t submit to sobriety tests or breathe into a Breathalyzer. According to the arrest report, “Williams stated that he played football for FSU and just wanted to go home.” Unfortunately for the FSU starter, his name isn’t Jameis Winston and this wasn’t a rape case. Tallahassee PD and FSU’s police take DUIs seriously. Well, sometimes.
Harrison drops the f-bomb
On Saturday night, to celebrate Easter, Jesus gifted the world with a Kentucky loss to Wisconsin in the Final Four. Indeed, “the first shall be last, and the last shall be first.” After the defeat, Kentucky players begrudgingly answered questions from the media. Asked about Wisconsin player Frank Kaminski, Kentucky star Andrew Harrison mumbled, “Fuck that nigger,” in a most un-Christian manner. Unbeknownst to Harrison, the microphones picked up his choice words. Notably, Harrison, who’s black, directed the expression toward Kaminsky, who’s white. Most likely, the incident will blow over well before the NBA draft. I’m no Aesop, so I’m not really sure what the moral of the story is. But it discomforts me that such a hateful, albeit passionate, comment can so easily be dismissed and forgotten.
CBS’s LaForce turns down proposal
Before Michigan State faced off against Duke in the Final Four on Saturday, an anonymous MSU fan proposed to CBS’s Allie LaForce while she was on air. Shockingly, LaForce, who’s already married, said no. Having seen several jumbotron proposals, it was my understanding that the rules of engagement required women to say yes to public proposals. Oh well, anonymous MSU fan. It can’t hurt to try, right?