The latest craze among college students around the nation is to take a “politics purity pledge” with their significant other.…
Homecoming bonfire good, not great, says local arsonist
TU’s bonfire had all the basics down — the fuel source was stable, it had proper ventilation, and it generated…
Top 5 couples costumes, according to exes
Couples costume: they’re sometimes cute, sometimes embarrassing and sometimes a bit of a bummer if you just broke up. If…
Nimrod Conference inspires, aids writing enthusiasts
This year’s Nimrod Writers Conference kicked off on Friday night at the Lorton Performance Center. There, guests watched the 38th…
Red Scare Book Fair houses counter-culture literature
Last weekend was the Red Scare Book Fair, a kind of quietly rebellious event hosted in the Nightingale Theater. Like…
Bon Iver’s new album departs from old sound
“It might be over soon,” chants an indistinctly high voice at the start of Bon Iver’s latest effort, “22, A…
Clinton got bigger piece of cake, claims Trump
At a debate after-party last Monday night, Donald Trump accused a caterer of serving Hillary Clinton a larger piece of…
“Evacuate? In our moment of triumph?” Pence asks stormtrooper
Indiana Governor Mike Pence, who is second in command of the Death Star, held a press conference today to shoot…
“Why does the media hate me?” Trump asks while strangling Bob Woodard
Trump has claimed to be the victim of a media bias against non-politicians running for president. When asked about this…
Supreme Court enjoys deadlock vacation
With the presidential election looming, The State-Run Media would like to take a minute and catch up with the Supreme…