To Whom it May Concern,

Spoilers are bad. We all know that. Some of us, like myself, go to great lengths to avoid seeing them. My reaction of becoming a nomad in the Sahara desert for a couple months to avoid Star Wars spoilers may have been on the more extreme end of this scale, but the point remains just the same. So imagine my surprise when I walked into class last Monday, and all of my teachers handed me syllabuses overflowing with spoilers of their own classes! And what’s more, they took a sadistic pleasure in announcing the spoilers to the entire class! You didn’t see JJ Abrams walking around before the release of The Force Awakens, announcing [REDACTED] for all the world to hear.

In some of my classes (I won’t name names), the instructors went as far as writing the exam dates, in bold text, on the first page. Seriously? It’s as if they wanted to rob me of all the wonderful little surprises of college. Nothing quite compares to the feeling of walking into class one day, and being completely and pleasantly surprised by an exam you had no idea was coming. Although not quite as grievous an offense, all of my professors were guilty of laying out a summary of all the topics to be covered in the class in the syllabus. This simple act takes away some of the joy of showing up to class, never knowing what to expect.

Although there is little I can do to stop professors’ blatant disregard for spoilers, perhaps some students can learn from my suffering, and take these lessons to heart. Currently, I can only recommend that every student skip the first few days of class, in the hope that they can experience the joy of a spoiler-free college experience.