A few weeks ago I wrote an editorial decrying the boring and pointless nature of All-Star games as undermining the…
Take me out to Spring Training
Roger Hornsby, one of baseball’s greats, once said, “People ask me what I do in winter when there’s no baseball.…
Gays cause earthquakes
I’ve been hearing some talk recently that the recent increase in the number of earthquakes in Oklahoma is because of…
Earthquakes are a result of pre-marital fracking
There’s no doubt that Oklahoma’s rising earthquake frequency is a sign from God, but there are many different opinions on…
Student doesn’t register to vote, still determined to complain
“Elections,” as Abraham Lincoln once said, “belong to the people.” In the modern political landscape, however, more emphasis seems to…
Bike thief extraordinaire unveils master plan
You probably aren’t reading this story from your bike. Not for the obvious reason that it’s dangerous—we all know you…
Phyllis Schlafly backs Bernie Sanders just to be contrary
In response to feminist icon Gloria Steinem’s recent show of support for Hillary Clinton, notable anti-feminist Phyllis Schlafly found herself…
Super-villain claims sole responsibility for global warming
Last Tuesday, in an event that shocked the world, a self-proclaimed “super-villain” floated down from his sky base to make…
Dry Gulch For Sale: Future plans uncertain, open to suggestions
If you’re a current student at TU, there’s a good chance you’re familiar with Dry Gulch. TU has used the…
A black hair affair: library hosts Black History Month event
The event, called “An Afrocentric Invitation: A Black Hair Affair,” began with a viewing of the short film, “You Can…