Okla. relief amid the government shutdown

The Collegian investigated relief efforts from the local food bank, TU and OU. Jan. 25 brought an end to the longest government shutdown in the history of the United States. After 35 days, President Trump signed a bill that put a temporary end to the shutdown. It began when the White House and Congress could […]

Bud-dies Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre being classy up high in the mountains. graphic by Conner Maggio

5 songs that are definitely not about weed

People take things too literally these days. Just because lyrics say the word weed doesn’t mean the song is about it. 1. “Weed Song” by Bone Thugs-N-Harmony – Definitely not about weed. Consider the lyrics, “Smoke another blunt, roll another up,” as the metaphor that they are. “Smoke” refers to vaporizing objects and ideals to […]

The Rams and the Patriots face off Feburary 2. graphic by Conner Maggio

2019 Super Bowl predictions

The Collegian sports writing staff gives their takes on who will win next Sunday’s big game between the New England Patriots and the LA Rams. Brennen: Do I want to go with the dynastic overlords known as the Brady Bunch? Or the somehow-even-less-charming-but-still-loveable underdogs, the L.A. Rams? The question almost seems to come down to […]

Brennen’s bangin’ baking bench: college edition

Move aside Mary Berry, millennial cooking is here to stay. Since the millennials and gen Z’ers apparently exaggerate the financial impossibility of a four-year degree, it looks like it’s up to us to pick ourselves up by our bootstraps and make do. So when three jobs aren’t paying enough to buy normal people food, but […]

New year, new Bezos: Jeff Bezos rocks a new ‘do in this Bachelor promo. graphic by Conner Maggio

Baezos, the Bachelor that we deserve

There’s one good thing to come out of the richest man in the world’s divorce, and that is a starring role on the hit reality show! While the workers of Amazon will likely see no benefit from Bezos losing half his money, the important thing is that white middle-class America feels victorious watching the billionaire […]

As the government falls apart, citizens man battleships, the Statue of Liberty is spray painted and Niagara Falls is full of suds. graphic by Conner Maggio

10 things to try this government shutdown

With the government closed, laws no longer apply. Take advantage with this list of things you’ve always wanted to do. Trump has shut down the government. Now that the feds are dead, state laws are going to come next, followed by local. Behold the New World Order. And since anarchy has finally, by God’s will, […]

Campus Crime Watch

Jan. 7 4:20 a.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to the roof of McFarlin Library to deal with a strange smell. Nearing the roof, the officers reported hearing Pink Floyd increasing in volume. The officers found two students sitting down who looked to be fine. The officers stayed with them to make […]

How much of your voting records are online?

A look into voting record websites and how much real info they offer. In America, an individual’s voting record is at least somewhat public in all 50 states. President Trump had fallen into controversy when people found during the 2016 presidential race that he had not registered to vote until 1987. This worried some voters […]

Rudy McRoadhog behind bars for breaking the Golden Rule: drive as one would wish others to drive. graphic by Conner Maggio

Hand wavin’ heathen handcuffed

Foreign trucker breaks longstanding Oklahoma tradition and awaits trial. Rudy “Chad” McRoadhog, a trucker from Ohio, passed through Oklahoma last weekend Oct. 3, 2018 and found himself in jail the next morning. McRoadhog neglected to make the mandatory hand-wave to a driver who let him into the right lane. The trucker reportedly wished to turn […]

The Bleacher Creature

With Brennen Gray as the Feature Creature. One for the History Books I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: pitching wins are some of the stupidest statistics in the sports world, and everyone should immediately stop pretending that they mean anything (I’ll give some leeway in fantasy baseball, but that’s it). In unrelated […]