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742 posts
One grande latte, hold the bureaucracy
Posted in State-Run

One grande latte, hold the bureaucracy

on 20 November 201920 November 2019

A simple question leaves me cutting through a jungle of red tape. I’m nearly there, dear reader. Answers are hard…

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Millions of emos rise from the depths  of the Earth for MCR’s return
We’re not okay (we promise). graphic by Sarah Le
Posted in State-Run

Millions of emos rise from the depths of the Earth for MCR’s return

on 12 November 201912 November 2019

Are you excited about MCR’s return? So are all the lost and forgotten emos of the world. After breaking up…

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Giuliani accidentally woos reporter, spills incriminating secrets
Dinner was lovely, but I’ll never forget dessert. ;) graphic by Emma Palmer
Posted in State-Run

Giuliani accidentally woos reporter, spills incriminating secrets

on 12 November 201912 November 2019

I think I’ve found the love of my life … and some shit about Trump. I’ve met someone. No, I’m…

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Emos endure TikTok e-boy invasion
Posted in State-Run

Emos endure TikTok e-boy invasion

on 12 November 201912 November 2019

A factionalized emo group is tested by a new age of alt kids. Located in Nebraska, the Cult of Unbelievers…

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Where has all the money gone?
Up from the witch’s brew came the Golden Hurricane. graphic by Emma Palmer
Posted in State-Run

Where has all the money gone?

on 12 November 201912 November 2019

The answer might surprise you. On Wednesday, Oct. 16, economics professor Dr. Matthew Hendricks gave a presentation comparing TU’s allocation…

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Four laws that weren’t voted in last week
Posted in State-Run

Four laws that weren’t voted in last week

on 12 November 201912 November 2019

How could our legislators leave out such robust additions? Ah yes, my favorite time of year! Oklahoma’s law changes are…

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The ultimate fast food pairing guide
The perfect pairing guide for your drunken late nights and hungover budget brunches. graphic by Emma Palmer
Posted in State-Run

The ultimate fast food pairing guide

on 7 November 20197 November 2019

College kid tested, reader approved. As the semester is wine-ing down, the drinking is intensifying, and for that reason, I…

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I’m not compensating for the size of my dick, I swear
Posted in State-Run

I’m not compensating for the size of my dick, I swear

on 7 November 20199 November 2019

Interview with “truck bro” goes horribly wrong. This week in “Strange Strangers found on the Vegas Strip,” I found a…

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Resident Assistant bravely disposes of confiscated alcohol and you’re all invited!
Pssh, who said it was difficult to get students to come to RA events? graphic by Sarah Le
Posted in State-Run

Resident Assistant bravely disposes of confiscated alcohol and you’re all invited!

on 7 November 20197 November 2019

“I gotta get rid of all this contraband somehow! Come help me out!” As an RA, one of my many…

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The (not so) secret life of Captain Cane
Animatronic mascots? Fuckin’ mint. graphic by Sarah Le
Posted in State-Run

The (not so) secret life of Captain Cane

on 7 November 20197 November 2019

What does Captain Cane get up to when he’s not on the football field? Captain Cane is the hunk of…

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