Try these tips at your own risk… of pleasure. Are you and your loved one having trouble in the bedroom?…
Campo arrests student for phallic object
TU student 3D prints a mysterious device in Stephenson. A TU student has been arrested on suspicion of attempting to…
Student ID anointed with Holy Number
A TU student has come out in protest of what she calls a “cruel joke” against her. Freshman Renee Lorenz…
Is Pluto t h i c c enough?
Curvy celebrities weigh in on Pluto’s planetary status. Pluto was stripped of its planet status years ago, a decision established…
Targeted ads single out singles, damage self-esteem
Russians send targeted ads to prey on this under-reproducing population. Targeted ads really suck, man. I have never bought even…
Wingman targeted ads score me a date
Who needs privacy when you have Ben & Jerry’s? If it weren’t for targeted ads, I am not sure how…
Fallin’s final fail
Mary Fallin’s final mission is to see just how low she can drag Oklahoma with her as she leaves office.…
Great British Porno
The newest season of The Great British Baking Show piqued the interest of many top porn companies. Your bag of…
Hashtags spell out end of the world
The end of the world shows people’s true colors as they post their last hashtag. Bruce sat alone in his…
The Dining Dozen dishes out deceit
An underground crime ring trades food for homework in this breaking news coverage. Something sinister is growing underneath the surface…