Confused about this new presidential power? Look no further than our reliable list. 1. It set the record for largest…
Millennials killing the institution of marriage
Old folks hate the youngins for ruining our country’s traditional marriage values. America is in grave danger. The pillars that…
Top 10 sexiest Halloween costumes
Here are a few Halloween costumes that are not irreverent or disrespectful in any way (and definitely not stupid). 1.…
Disgruntled students begin new Newspaper
Citing fascist Collegian editors, a group left to start their own rival paper. A group of disgruntled Collegian writers have…
Are animals more important than humans?
A TU student investigates if millennials pay more for their pets’ insurance than their own. A recent study from MIT’s…
Coke puts coke back in Coke
Nothing says Coca-Cola like cocaine! Coming soon to supermarket shelves near you, Coca-Cola has announced a new line of cocaine-infused…
State-Run creates virtual assistant “That Bitch!”
Move over Siri and Alexa, there’s a new bitch in town. The creators of the State-Run (Social) Media and Dating…
Sexy advice for your sexy life
Try these tips at your own risk… of pleasure. Are you and your loved one having trouble in the bedroom?…
Campo arrests student for phallic object
TU student 3D prints a mysterious device in Stephenson. A TU student has been arrested on suspicion of attempting to…
Student ID anointed with Holy Number
A TU student has come out in protest of what she calls a “cruel joke” against her. Freshman Renee Lorenz…