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Outgoing Student Government Association president gives end-of-the-year interview

Outgoing Student Government Association president gives end-of-the-year interview

on 14 May 2026
TU Percussion Ensemble performs six well-rehearsed songs

TU Percussion Ensemble performs six well-rehearsed songs

on 4 May 20264 May 2026
Public safety school funding continuing after Pauls Valley shooting

Public safety school funding continuing after Pauls Valley shooting

on 29 April 2026
Horoscopes

Horoscopes

on 29 April 2026
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Horoscopes
Posted in Satire State-Run

Horoscopes

on 3 October 2022

Aries — They say one bad apple spoils the whole bunch but that won’t matter because every cop is a…

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State Run Media midterm coverage: top 10 Governor Stitt moments
Posted in Satire State-Run

State Run Media midterm coverage: top 10 Governor Stitt moments

on 3 October 2022

Looking back at the highlights of Governor Kevin Stitt’s impressive first term in office, I chose my personal favorites. When…

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Possible uses for now defunct Kendall Hall
Posted in Satire State-Run

Possible uses for now defunct Kendall Hall

on 26 September 2022

There are many different options for what to do with Kendall Hall, but which option is the best? Unless you…

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Professors ask students to tip for their services
Posted in Satire State-Run

Professors ask students to tip for their services

on 26 September 202222 April 2024

Professors ask students to tip after lectures and grading exams because they obviously don’t get paid enough. If you ask…

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University installing mandatory gun use training because ‘you’re on your own’
Posted in Satire State-Run

University installing mandatory gun use training because ‘you’re on your own’

on 19 September 2022

The training was accompanied by new policy encouraging all students to strap up. As it does every fall, the university…

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Rabid lawn Roombas out for blood
Posted in Satire State-Run

Rabid lawn Roombas out for blood

on 19 September 202222 April 2024

The lawn Roombas get a taste for blood. Administration doesn’t care, but what else is new? In August, TU bought…

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Queen’s death jarring for U.S. politicians
Posted in Satire State-Run

Queen’s death jarring for U.S. politicians

on 12 September 2022

Numerous governmental officials in the United States have begun acting upon impulse in a moment paralysing the U.K. Article republished…

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Sororities pledge to better support brunettxs
Posted in Satire State-Run

Sororities pledge to better support brunettxs

on 12 September 2022

TU Panhellenic Council pledges to work towards a future with more hair color diversity, frats protest. Ever working towards a…

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Okay, but which religion is right?
Posted in Satire State-Run

Okay, but which religion is right?

on 5 September 2022

First-year student getting confused as to which campus ministry group they need to join to avoid eternal damnation. Picture this:…

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Student guide to using crystals the right way
Posted in Satire State-Run

Student guide to using crystals the right way

on 5 September 202222 April 2024

Local crystal girl shares her expertise because your aura is seriously fucked up. If you’re looking for love this semester,…

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